Today my mom woulda be 86

[Ruth]

Today is my mom's birthday.  I am really missing her.  She refused cancer treatment after being diagnosed.

She loved this song:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3JWTaaS7LdU

[Catherine]

What a beautiful song. It fits so perfectly with you missing your mom on her birthday. No matter how many years pass, your mom will always be your mom and you will always think of her.

I am glad you were able to be close with the years that you had. A big hug to you. I always think of my mom on my birthday. It was the one day of the year that I knew she would have been thinking of me.

[Ruth]

Yes, I'm sure she is thinking of you on your birthday just as I thought of my mom on her birthday.

[cathie]

It is a beautiful song, I believe that our deceased loved ones know when we think of them.

my mom had cancer too, it was too late for treatment when they found it, she was only 60.

[Catherine]

No matter who you are or how long you live, you only have one mom and you never forget her and she never forgets you.

I am sorry both of you lost your mothers so young. Cancer is often undetectable until it is too far advanced for treatment. Sometimes it is better to enjoy the time you have left. Some forms of cancer just have no effective treatment even now. It is sad, but we know that someday we will see them again. And someday cancer will be beaten.

[Ruth]

Thank you Catherine. Cathy I am sorry your mom died of cancer, too, it's an awful way to go when they catch it late. My mom refused conventional or traditional treatment. She did have some tumors removed, though. Before she passed she was sorry that she didn't have her entire breast removed. She was in horrible pain when the cancer spread all over. They put her on morphine and that made her sleep most of the time. She even lost her mind somewhat at the end. She was hallucinating. I think it was because she was taking so much morphine and another drug, too. At times she seemed lucid, too, though.

[Catherine]

Ruth I feel for your mother. Some breast cancers are very aggressive. All you can do is buy time. There is no cure.
Towards the end the morphine does seem to take control, but it does detach a person from their pain. It just makes the person seem like they are not there any more, but as you say, she had lucid moments. There is no easy way to die of cancer. The nurses and doctors do the best they can, but some things are still hard.  Your mother was a brave woman. You must really miss her.

[Cibach]

We lost my Dad last year to bile duct cancer. We should have lost him at the time he was diagnosed, but were extremely fortunate to have 6 more months.
Cancer takes courage and strength from all involved. And those left behind should take strength from knowing that their loved ones are now at peace and out of pain and suffering.

[Ruth]

I'm sorry you lost your Dad Cibach.

[cathie]

My condolences to you Cibach, Yes, it's hard to see them in so much pain, or all drugged with morphine.