Today my mom woulda be 86

[Catherine]

I think all of our lives have been touched by cancer. We have all lost someone. It is just so much more personal and so much harder when it is a parent. My condolences to all of you. If you have a few extra months to spend time with a loved on then you are blessed, but it is still never easy.

Gradually we are finding cures and causes, but that will not help the current generations who are effected by cancer. The work we do today to fight cancer will benefit out grandchildren. Lives are being saved now, but the real cure is finding was to stop cancer from growing in the first place. I look forward to that day.

In the mean time I hope that even in your loses you have found peace.

[Cibach]

Thank you for your condolences. It will be a year at the end of April. The time has flown.
I take a great deal of comfort in my family, people and piggies.

I spent my working life with people who had cancer but never thought it would affect my family, but I was able to draw on my experience and knew each stage as we reached it. Having held and comforted my piggies as they passed, the actual moment and process held no fear for me as I recognised the stages and I was able to feel a strange contentment knowing that my Dad was at peace and we had done everything we could for him. I was able to whisper in his ear as he passed and I told him all the things I hope someone will be able to tell me when it's my time. I know he heard me as some strange things happened after. Strange but comforting.

I sincerely hope medical research can get to grips with cancer prevention. Cancer and Alzheimer's are, I feel, the two illnesses that will cause mankind the most trouble as populations age.

[Ruth]

(02-16-2016, 05:03 PM)Catherine Wrote: Ruth I feel for your mother. Some breast cancers are very aggressive. All you can do is buy time. There is no cure.
Towards the end the morphine does seem to take control, but it does detach a person from their pain. It just makes the person seem like they are not there any more, but as you say, she had lucid moments. There is no easy way to die of cancer. The nurses and doctors do the best they can, but some things are still hard.  Your mother was a brave woman. You must really miss her.

Thank you Catherine.  When she first discovered she had breast cancer she had a lump removed.  She didn't try any conventional treatments but she took some alternative things and then 8 years later the cancer returned, spread, and she died. I know it was horrible for her to go through and it was horrible to watch her go through it.  Yes, she is at peace now.

[Catherine]

Quote: I sincerely hope medical research can get to grips with cancer prevention. Cancer and Alzheimer's are, I feel, the two illnesses that will cause mankind the most trouble as populations age.

Cibach it was wonderful that you could be there are say the things that needed to be said. You went through the loss as a process and it has left you at peace. It is hard to believe it has almost been a year. Time seems to stop when someone is dying and it seems to race after they are gone.
Ruth, your mother did well that she had eight years after the first treatment. Some cancers do come back. I don't know if chemo would have helped. Sometimes it does, but it is a very harsh treatment and sometimes a person does not want to go through it.
I don't know if I would want to go through it. It is a personal decision that no one can make unless they are the one facing the chemo.
We find cures and treatments for cancer, but we don't have a fix yet. Someday we will figure out why cancer happens. Then we can find out how to have it not happen.

[cathie]

Catherine I've thought about this a lot, there are Cancer hospitals, to me finding a cure is all about money, as long as there are treatments everyone seems happy, but there is big money to be made with all the cancer charities, I know that just in Vancouver there is a high rise bldg for the cancer agency, that's a lot of office workers, I'd be happier to see a big bldg full of research scientists instead. If a cure was found a lot of people would be out of work. I'd also like to see more research done on Alzheimers. There are no runs for it that I know of, or anything like pink products etc. that cancer has.

[Catherine]

There are some small Alzheimer's fund raisers, but it only effects older people(early onset is uncommon). It will never have the appeal of cancer.
Cancer can happen to anyone, even babies. It has a universal  appeal for fundraising. 
You are right, cancer, cancer fundraising and  cancer societies and groups have become an industry in themselves.
A lot of people work in that industry.

I wish there was more research being done. There has been progress and some forms of cancer are treatable.
We certainly have better detection methods. Of course now they push people to be screened for all kinds of things even when there is no indication. They have created a fear of cancer in some people.  

We would do well to focus of general good health and nutrition. That would help eliminate a lot of things like diabetes, high blood pressure, stroke and heart conditions. In the process of focusing on good health we would reduce some cancers and people would be better able to overcome them if they were healthy.

We won't do that of course. We will continue to have big fundraisers and keep the disease industry going.

[Ruth]

(02-22-2016, 05:21 PM)Catherine Wrote:

Quote: I sincerely hope medical research can get to grips with cancer prevention. Cancer and Alzheimer's are, I feel, the two illnesses that will cause mankind the most trouble as populations age.

Cibach it was wonderful that you could be there are say the things that needed to be said. You went through the loss as a process and it has left you at peace. It is hard to believe it has almost been a year. Time seems to stop when someone is dying and it seems to race after they are gone.
Ruth, your mother did well that she had eight years after the first treatment. Some cancers do come back. I don't know if chemo would have helped. Sometimes it does, but it is a very harsh treatment and sometimes a person does not want to go through it.
I don't know if I would want to go through it. It is a personal decision that no one can make unless they are the one facing the chemo.
We find cures and treatments for cancer, but we don't have a fix yet. Someday we will figure out why cancer happens. Then we can find out how to have it not happen.

When she first had cancer they offered her radiation therapy.  She heard bad things about that and didn't want it.  Later they offered her some kind of pills and they made her horribly ill so she stopped taking them.  She wanted hospice for her end of life.  They kept her very comfortable and checked on her often.  I visited her, too.  I can't talk about it any more.

[Catherine]

Some things are too painful to talk about even after many years.

I wish I could give you a big hug. Losing your mother is never easy.

[Ruth]

Thank you Catherine. Cancer is a horrible illness. They keep saying in news stories that they have cures for it, yet people keep dying from it. They should get these new drugs on the market to save people's lives already!

[Tobi]

Blessings to your Mom's Soul, Ruth, and to you, who love her very much.
It is true that she is now released from any pain she went through while here. And she still loves you. Send her love from your Heart. You will be reunited one day.

I have a feeling she has found a lovely garden and is waiting for you and giving you spiritual support.