Some Crazy Laws! lol

[Tobi]

Well I just had to post this because some of these absolutely weird laws are serious ones!

http://www.2spare.com/item_66642.aspx

There are quite a few "animal funnies" in there too, such as "It is illegal to chain your Alligator to a fire hydrant"....and..."In Alaska kangaroos are not allowed in barber shops!"...."You are not permitted to wear cowboy boots unless you already own at least two cows"....and....
"In Ventura County, California, cats and dogs are not allowed to have sex without a permit."


lol

This has all the makings of a really brilliant cop comedy show.

[Ruth]

 Those are so funny.  Thanks for the laugh!

[Catherine]

My favourites: 
The Arkansas legislature passed a law that states that the Arkansas River can rise no higher than to the Main Street bridge in Little Rock. I wonder how they plan to enforce this.
California, a city ordinance states that a $500 fine will be given to anyone who detonates a nuclear device within city limits.  It is illegal to eat an orange in your bath tub. You  may as well eat the orange. If your neighbour can get away with a $500.00 dollar fine for detonating a nuke, what can they do to you for eating an orange.  How do they plan to collect the money from the guy who sets off the bomb.

Colorado, It is unlawful to lend your vacuum cleaner to your next-door neighbor
Seriously! How silly can you get.

Connecticut, A local ordinance in Atwoodville, Connecticut prohibits people from playing Scrabble while waiting for a politician to speak.  In Simsbury, Conn., it's illegal for a politician to campaign at the town dump.
What is it about Connecticut and politicians.



That is as far as I have read so far. I am saving some for tomorrow. Also it is after 2am here and who knows there may be a law that says you cannot laugh at silly laws after 2am. It makes as much sense as the other laws.

[LPC]

(03-29-2016, 04:30 PM)Catherine Wrote: California, a city ordinance states that a $500 fine will be given to anyone who detonates a nuclear device within city limits.  It is illegal to eat an orange in your bath tub. You  may as well eat the orange. If your neighbour can get away with a $500.00 dollar fine for detonating a nuke, what can they do to you for eating an orange.  How do they plan to collect the money from the guy who sets off the bomb.

Rotating LOL Rotating LOL    A double LOL for the above, Catherine. Also to Tobi for starting the thread!

[Tobi]

That nuclear bomb one was the best I think   I agree....why not eat an orange in your bathtub if the only deterrent against being nuked is a $500 fine...collected, I presume posthumously??
Live dangerously HAHAHA!

My mind had fun with this today, when it had time...I already came up with the credits and opening scenes for the crazy cop show...

[Catherine]

I want to know who would be left to collect the $500.00 if your neighbour sets off a nuke.


Delaware:
[*]In Delaware it is illegal to get married on a dare.
[*]In Delaware you may not sell dead people for money without a license.

Are they strange in Delaware or what?

D.C.     The U.S. government says it's a crime to give false weather reports.
I would say don't become a weatherman in D.C. you are heading for a life of crime.

Florida:  Having sexual relations with a porcupine is illegal.
            Florida law forbids rats to leave the ships docked in Tampa Bay.
            If an elephant is left tied to a parking meter, the parking fee has to be paid just as it would for a vehicle.
            It is illegal to fish while driving across a bridge.
            In Miami, it is forbidden to imitate an animal.
            Does Florida have a problem with animals? Would an elephant tied to a parking meter stay put and would the parking meter still be there? How do they plan to keep the rats from leaving the ship?


Georgia: In Atlanta, Georgia, it is illegal to tie a giraffe to a telephone pole or street lamp.
             In Quitman, It is illegal for a chicken to cross the road.
They have a lot of giraffes in Georgia do they?  So do they ticket the chicken or the chicken's owner? If the chicken is out there crossing the road, how do you prove whose chicken it is? How do you prove who owns the giraffe?

I have to wonder who thinks these laws up. Seriously, do they have giraffes in Georgia? How many elephants were tied to parking meters in Florida? 


I would watch that cop show. It would be hilarious.

[LPC]

(03-30-2016, 03:09 PM)Catherine Wrote: I want to know who would be left to collect the $500.00 if your neighbour sets off a nuke.


Delaware:
[*]In Delaware it is illegal to get married on a dare.
[*]In Delaware you may not sell dead people for money without a license.

Are they strange in Delaware or what?

D.C.     The U.S. government says it's a crime to give false weather reports.
I would say don't become a weatherman in D.C. you are heading for a life of crime.

Florida:  Having sexual relations with a porcupine is illegal.
            Florida law forbids rats to leave the ships docked in Tampa Bay.
            If an elephant is left tied to a parking meter, the parking fee has to be paid just as it would for a vehicle.
            It is illegal to fish while driving across a bridge.
            In Miami, it is forbidden to imitate an animal.
            Does Florida have a problem with animals? Would an elephant tied to a parking meter stay put and would the parking meter still be there? How do they plan to keep the rats from leaving the ship?


Georgia: In Atlanta, Georgia, it is illegal to tie a giraffe to a telephone pole or street lamp.
             In Quitman, It is illegal for a chicken to cross the road.
They have a lot of giraffes in Georgia do they?  So do they ticket the chicken or the chicken's owner? If the chicken is out there crossing the road, how do you prove whose chicken it is? How do you prove who owns the giraffe?

I have to wonder who thinks these laws up. Seriously, do they have giraffes in Georgia? How many elephants were tied to parking meters in Florida? 


I would watch that cop show. It would be hilarious.

[*]

Another great set of laws, Catherine! To answer some of your queries, in equally humorous mode:

Weather reports:
It looks like all weather forecasters all over the world are in danger - especially Michael Fish, who years ago denied that a hurricance was heading for the UK - and then it hit! It's been a joke in the UK ever since. He was actually a very popular weather reporter.

Having sexual relations with a porcupine is illegal:
Ouch! The mind boggles at the very thought!

Florida law forbids rats to leave the ships docked in Tampa Bay:
Ah, that's easy. The police arrive and put handcuffs on the offending rats...

If an elephant is left tied to a parking meter, the parking fee has to be paid just as it would for a vehicle:
...Not just the parking fee, but also the cost of replacing the meter, after it has been pulled out by the elephant!

It is illegal to fish while driving across a bridge:
...Unless you are riding slowly on an elephant

In Miami, it is forbidden to imitate an animal:
Oh dear! I won't go there then. I regularly make a humming noise to imitate our alpacas. We hum to each other.

In Quitman, it is illegal for a chicken to cross the road:
...That is to discourage them from getting to the other side!  

Thank you so much for making my day, Catherine!

[Ruth]

Those are all very funny Catherine and LPC!!

[Tobi]

(03-30-2016, 05:31 PM)LPC Wrote:

(03-30-2016, 03:09 PM)Catherine Wrote: I want to know who would be left to collect the $500.00 if your neighbour sets off a nuke.


Delaware:
[*]In Delaware it is illegal to get married on a dare.
[*]In Delaware you may not sell dead people for money without a license.

Are they strange in Delaware or what?

D.C.     The U.S. government says it's a crime to give false weather reports.
I would say don't become a weatherman in D.C. you are heading for a life of crime.

Florida:  Having sexual relations with a porcupine is illegal.
            Florida law forbids rats to leave the ships docked in Tampa Bay.
            If an elephant is left tied to a parking meter, the parking fee has to be paid just as it would for a vehicle.
            It is illegal to fish while driving across a bridge.
            In Miami, it is forbidden to imitate an animal.
            Does Florida have a problem with animals? Would an elephant tied to a parking meter stay put and would the parking meter still be there? How do they plan to keep the rats from leaving the ship?


Georgia: In Atlanta, Georgia, it is illegal to tie a giraffe to a telephone pole or street lamp.
             In Quitman, It is illegal for a chicken to cross the road.
They have a lot of giraffes in Georgia do they?  So do they ticket the chicken or the chicken's owner? If the chicken is out there crossing the road, how do you prove whose chicken it is? How do you prove who owns the giraffe?

I have to wonder who thinks these laws up. Seriously, do they have giraffes in Georgia? How many elephants were tied to parking meters in Florida? 


I would watch that cop show. It would be hilarious.

[*]

Another great set of laws, Catherine! To answer some of your queries, in equally humorous mode:

Weather reports:
It looks like all weather forecasters all over the world are in danger - especially Michael Fish, who years ago denied that a hurricance was heading for the UK - and then it hit! It's been a joke in the UK ever since. He was actually a very popular weather reporter.

Having sexual relations with a porcupine is illegal:
Ouch! The mind boggles at the very thought!

Florida law forbids rats to leave the ships docked in Tampa Bay:
Ah, that's easy. The police arrive and put handcuffs on the offending rats...

If an elephant is left tied to a parking meter, the parking fee has to be paid just as it would for a vehicle:
...Not just the parking fee, but also the cost of replacing the meter, after it has been pulled out by the elephant!

It is illegal to fish while driving across a bridge:
...Unless you are riding slowly on an elephant

In Miami, it is forbidden to imitate an animal:
Oh dear! I won't go there then. I regularly make a humming noise to imitate our alpacas. We hum to each other.

In Quitman, it is illegal for a chicken to cross the road:
...That is to discourage them from getting to the other side!  

Thank you so much for making my day, Catherine!

[*]

In Delaware you may not sell dead people for money without a license.


(Things to do in Delaware when you're dead....LOL.....but seriously -who applies for a license to sell dead people for money anyway?)

The U.S. government says it's a crime to give false weather reports.

(It's a good job that law doesn't apply to England or that's just about every weather reporter heading for jail. if they say it's going to snow it hardly ever does except on top of the Cairngorms....and if they say it's going to be a dry sunny day it rains.)

Having sexual relations with a porcupine is illegal.

(I presume this applies to humans, dogs, cats, (giraffes?) ? Because if it apples to porcupines that species is absolutely done for! LOL -Unless they would be happy to move to Vegas, or elsewhere, where I presume porcupine2porcupine nuptials are allowed?)

In Quitman, It is illegal for a chicken to cross the road.

(I imagine the cops would stick a ticket on the chicken, then have to follow the chicken home for the money, because chickens don't usually carry wallets. That could take a little time, if the chicken was not intent on going straight home, and was impervious to suggestions or persuasion.)

[Catherine]

Hawaii is almost sensible compared to other states.

Honolulu: Within the limits of any public park, it is unlawful to annoy any bird. This does make sense.

In Hawaii it is illegal to get a tattoo behind your ear or on your eyelid unless in the presence of a registered physician.
Even this makes some sense because these are medically vulnerable areas.

You will be fined if you do not own a boat. This gets a little silly, but it is an island so a boat does make sense.

Hawaii might be a sensible place to live. I wouldn't have expected that. Of course it has been a state less time than the other states.

Idaho restores my faith in silliness.
It is illegal for a man to give his sweetheart a box of candy weighing less than fifty pounds.  Where would you find a fifty pound box of chocolates? I have never seen anything that big.

If you're 88 years of age or older, it's illegal for you to ride your motorcycle.
If you can ride a motorcycle at 88 they should give you a medal not a ticket.
You may not fish on a camel's back. 
I assume it is okay to fish on an elephants back or perhaps a giraffe, but not a camel. I wonder how many camels there are in Idaho. It is a landlocked state so I wonder how many lakes there are. Maybe camel's don't like fishing.

Illinois: This state is a treasure trove of silliness.

 Chicago: Law forbids eating in a place that is on fire  You need a law to tell you that this is a bad idea?

           Des Plaines: Wheelbarrows with For-Sale signs may not be chained to trees. Perhaps they can be chained to parking meters after the elephants are done with them

 It is unlawful to change clothes in an automobile with the curtains drawn, except in case of fire. What is it with the fire thing? Is the car on fire or is it the clothes that are on fire. How many cars have curtains anyhow and should a car have curtains?

Homer: It is against the law to use a slingshot unless your are a law enforcement officer. I have never seen a law enforcement officer with a sling shot. "Halt or I will hit you with a stone from my sling shot"  just doesn't have the impact of "Halt or I will shoot". What's next, water pistils?

In Illinois, it is illegal for anyone to give lighted cigars to dogs, cats, and other domesticated animal kept as pets
Do people normally let their pets smoke?

In Chicago it is also illegal to take a French poodle to the opera, and for women over 200 pounds (90 kilos) to ride horses in shorts
Everyone knows French Poodles prefer the Ballet anyhow!   So is it illegal for the 200 pound woman to wear the shorts or is it illegal for her to ride a horse that is wearing shorts.  There is a big difference you know.

In Chicago, it is illegal to fish in pajamas.
Unless of course you are riding a camel, elephant or giraffe.

It is against the law for a monster to enter the corporate limits of Urbana, Illinois.
Does anyone else find it weird that they believe in monsters?

Kenilworth: A rooster must step back three hundred feet from any residence if he wishes to crow; Hens that wish to cackle must step two hundred feet back from any residence.
I am wondering how they enforce this. Do they give the birds warning tickets for first offences?

Kirkland: Bees are not allowed to fly over the village or through any of Kirkland's streets. Do they have signs written in Bee explaining these laws?

Moline: Ice skating at the Riverside pond during the months of June and August is prohibited
It is also impossible. They do know that June and August are summer months don't they?

Pullman: It is illegal to drink beer out of a bucket while sitting on the curb; It is forbidden to fish while sitting on a giraffe's neck
Does that mean it is legal to drink out of a bucket elsewhere or can you drink out of something else, like a pail, while sitting on the curb? And if you do this, does it lead to fishing while sitting on a giraffe's neck? What about a camel or an elephant? Maybe you can drink the beer from a bucket while sitting on the camel and fishing.

Do they have a lot of weird fishing problems in Illinois?

I think if you are looking for silliness, Illinois is the place to visit. After all where else can you go and find people who fish in their pajamas, drink beer from buckets and have to be told to leave a burning building before they eat? No wonder they ride giraffes.